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Anonymous November 1, 2009

Social Activity for Teenagers, what's right?

Anonymous
My son is in 10th at a very small school that doesn't have many social opportunities. Kids at the high school come from six school districts. If there were social activities that were interesting for him, he would probably participate, but dumb stuff like square dance (next week) are not very interesting for him. I am asking that he go to church youth group once a week and he gets along there and usually enjoys it. How much socializing is normal outside of school? Should I worry if he doesn’t ever go out? As a person from large highschool in the 70's, dating and regular socializing at parties was the norm. What is the norm these days? He went to the spring dance stag as a freshman and had a great time dancing and talking. He just finds the usual texting and mundane chit chat to be boring.
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Parent Answers to "Social Activity for Teenagers, what's right?"

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wkgmom1962
wkgmom1962 November 4, 2009
Hi. Thank you for your answer. That is really my feeling as well, maybe push him to make sure he does something like youthgroup, possibly find another group that shares his interests. He's in the forensics and drama clubs. Perhaps that's good enough as he does enjoy it and socialize within the club structure. With his free time he likes to write, read, play computer games and watch movies in particular genres. He doesn't watch TV or play video games anymore. He does some volunteer work through scouting. I will join the HS parents group and thanks again.
healthy11
healthy11 November 1, 2009
Hi. I don't think there is a "norm" in terms of time spent socializing outside of school. Truthfully, if your son doesn't complain about the lack of social opportunities, but doesn't seem depressed, I wouldn't worry about it too much.
If your does hope to attend college someday, it might be helpful for him to at least have some kind of club or leadership involvement to list on his applications, but even volunteer work can look good. What does your son like to do with his free time?
Some kids are actually more mature than their peers, and just don't care for the "mundane chit chat" and "one-upmanship" that a lot of their classmates might waste time talking about. (Stories of who has a crush on who, or boasting about underage drinking at a party, etc. are not for the kind of conversations most parents want their kids to engage in, anyway.)
You might find that when he's old enough to start driving, he becomes more inclined to "hang out" with some other kids. Maybe he's a "late bloomer" and will become more interested in socializing in college, with kids who share similar interests in the same major. For now, ongoing weekly participation with the church youth group seems like a reasonable thing to do.
To get other parents' opinions, you might like to join Greatschools High School Parents Group at community.greatschools.net/groups/11529

Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of GreatSchools. GreatSchools does not check for accuracy in community posts or verify the contributor’s identity. If you are searching for health-related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Community Guidelines for more details.
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