should a first grade teacher suggest spanking to a parent?

The infamous phone call from the teacher was at 10:06 am, 2-24-09. Immediately after everything went down with the Principal yesterday, I called the Superintendant's office. I could not speak with him, however it was the Asst. Superintendant. big mistake. I do not seem to have any luck with the Asst's in this matter. I went through the whole mess with him and described everything that occurred w/ this phone call and everything that had transpired that day with the Principal. After I finished, he said, " so you were upset about the time of day that the teacher called?" This whole situation is simply a sick situation that has simply begun because this woman is seeking revenge on me, the mother, because I called her out about the phone call. My daughter was in Private school before this with absolutely zero problems. In fact 2 of my daughter's teachers are members of her husbands church. You can sure bet that they are going to get an earful. This woman is absolutely ridiculous. She had including my daughter 18 children in her class, 1 teacher's assistant, and 1 student teacher helping in her class. This is/was the most chaotic classroom, that I have ever seen. My daughter has told me that 2 boys in the classroom, hit their private parts in tune with a song, in front of her. They were never disciplined. She was pushed down 4 times by one of these boys. He was never disciplined. She was stabbed in the eye. That boy was never disciplined. However, my daughter called 1 girl a "scaredy-cat" and was facing expulsion. This lady has it out for my daughter.

Wow; I'm shocked that this is a public school, because then there ought to be formal district policies that determine what is appropriate disciplinary action, not just the whim of a teacher or principal. Besides phone calling the Asst. Principal after the phone call, did you do anything to document what happened? (Legally, it really helps to have a "paper trail" or written record of what's transpired.) I'm wondering if you were to now send a letter to the School District Superintendent, and copy the School Board Members, whether they would respond differently. Ask them for a copy of the District guidelines/grounds for suspension. I bet there aren't any that pertain to your daughter's situation. (School Principals report to the Superintendent, so that's why I recommend going up the chain.)
I'd like to also recommend that you post your situation in the Educational Laws/Violations Group at community.greatschools.net/groups/77570; the woman who leads that group may know if you've got a case to make a claim with your state's Board of Education, or Office of Civil Rights.
Are you going to be able to keep your daughter in the other school for next year and beyond? So long as the current Principal is at the other school, it sounds like your daughter is not going to have an easy time...

This is a public school. A North Carolina school of Excellence. The teacher was or is apparently upset, because I called her out to the administration about her phone call. This was back in February. The accusations were completely inappropriate. I had never heard from the teacher again. I was called to the Principal's office on 5-7-09. At this time, I was told by the Principal that the teacher did not want my daughter in the class anymore. And had not wanted her in there since the beginning of the year. I asked the Principal if her problem with my daughter started around February (the time of the phone call). She would not answer. I explained the situation of the phone call to her, because obviously, I thought that the Asst. Principal, to whom I had discussed the phone call with back in Feb. had not talked to her as she said that she would. I had not heard anything from anyone prior to this. The principal dismissed it. I asked her if she could put my daughter in another first grade class. She refused. She said my option was to remove her and that she would repeat the First grade again, in another school. My daughter had excellent grades, perfect attendance, and there was only 20 days left until the end of the year. Luckily, my husband and I own another house in another school district, and I was able today to place her a new school for the next 20 days. Her new school, teacher, and Principal are absolutely fabulous! I mentioned the fact that the teacher is a minister's wife due to the fact, that one would assume the wife of someone who has heard the calling from God would not treat a 7 year old in this manner.

Is the child at a private school or public? (I'm guessing private with a religious affiliation, since you mention a minister's wife.) If that's the case, unfortunately, when dealing with a private school that doesn't accept government funding, you don't have much legal recourse. Is there a written policy manual that shows a month suspension is appropriate for whatever happened in this situation, or are they making up the rules as they go? Is there another first grade class your son could transfer into, with a different teacher?

You mention that the administration ignores the problem, but I'm not sure what exactly the problem is. Are they saying your child is being suspended because he's a threat to his own sibilings? (Is he a twin, or is it a multiage classroom? Or is the child really threatening other students in the class, and they feel he must be a problem at home with his siblings, too?)

I don't know if it's a situation where you could try to appeal to their "personal" side, and at least get your child to finish out the year. You might be able to "buy time" by saying that "For reasons that only God understands, some children are born with more challenges than others. I'm talking to professionals to try and determine what to do next. Please give us a chance to complete this year." If things are as difficult as they appear, maybe you want to speak to your child's pediatrician, and get a referral to a child psychologist, who can assess the situation and either write the school a letter saying that "In his professional opinion, your child does not pose a threat to others" or if there is an underlying condition, such as ADHD impulsivity or something else, it can be identified and treated. At a minimum, you could also enquire about what local public school options exist for next year, or even for the remainder of this year if they refuse to allow your child to return.