I agree that at the very least you should talk with your daughter's pediatrician about her anxiety. I also recommend meeting with her teacher to get some insight on what is happening in the classroom.

Almost every adult I know has a story about being bullied as a child, I agree that it's important to give our kids the tools and resources to cope with bullying. Do you know what she's being teased about? I think getting to the root of the problem is a good first step in helping her find solutions.
As parents, it's unimaginably hard to watch our children struggle, but I'm sure you will be able to help her get through this rough patch.

Please keep us posted on your daughter's progress.

My 11 also has anxiety about school and has since kindergarten. He does not like change at all. When he moved forward to second grade he was put into a looping class (same teacher for 2nd & 3rd grade). That was a big help for him, already knowing the teacher upon entering 3rd grade. He does not like change of any kind. If he has a routine and knows things first hand he seems to handle it much better. Some examples as follows:
1.Bringing his lunch to school - no worries about wether or not he would like the school lunch.
2. Emailing his teachers weekly as to what to expect the following week, tests, quizes, projects due etc. to help study in advance or finish projects on the weekends.
3. Invite some new friends over (one's that do not pick on her)
4. Help keep note books organized to be able to find homework etc so that they are not panicking when it is time to hand them in.
5. one on one extra help after school so that the teacher/child build a relationship will help ease anxiety. There are many of creative things you could try. Good luch

Thank You, My daughter is a competitive ice skater and competes in karate tournaments. She has friends within her sports events. Her problem with bullies is that she is African American and attending a 98% white school. She does not display any type of anxiety when it comes to her sporting competitions. How does she get a B average I ask myself that question daily, especially since she could car less about school or doing he homework. She is the type of kid that is on the move and very focused when her body is moving. She enjoys alot of activities and is willing to try any activity as long as it involves moving. She will immediately back away from school stuff, she hates to read and does not understand math at all. what is even sadder is that my daughter is in the 4th grade and can not tell time on a regular clock and a digital she can tell the time but does not understand it. However, she can explain to you force and speed and friction when it comes to ice skating. I had her screened for any type of learning difficulty and she was in the average range and even went as far as looking for a speech and lang/ auditory processing delay nothing showed up. She can memorize 28 steps in her form for karate in 1/2 hour and not miss a beat, she can can memorize and skate to music with perfect timing a skating routine after one practice session. She can not memorize her multiplication, addition or subtraction facts. I have worked endless hours and Incorporated activities that she is good at to try and help. Her coach has flash cards with her. My daughter has to write a story and was struggling to no end with it last year. The little that she had made no sense. I put her on the ice with a small recorder and told her to skate and record the story. in and 1/2 hour she had a full story that took up the 8 pages blank book she needed to write it in. The story made sense. To some level I think I understand what she means when there is no point to school. School to my daughter is complete frustration and and endless amount of work which I believe she does not understand most of it. She has an average IQ (101).

Some of the things you described about your daughter is what my oldest 17 year old has been going through since 4th grade. Only he was diagnosed ADD & Executive Function Learning disorder. Since you have not found anything significant you could possibly try a social worker or psychologist for her to talk to. I'm sure you are well aware that a 4th grader should be able to tell time. Keep trying and good luck to you and your family

Thank You! I did some research on Executive Functioning Disorder and it sounds just like my daughter. She is diagnosed with ADD. She is not medicated because we tried several meds and even the lowest dose made her a zombie. She could not get off the couch to do any homework. I either had a child who could not focus and complete work or a kid that slept all day and still did not complete homework. I don't totally believe she is a 'true" ADD child. The ADD BEHAVIORS ONLY SHOW UP WHEN IT COMES TO SCHOOL AND HOMEWORK. She has no problem with attention during skating practices(2 hours), karate class, voice lessons etc. She was diagnosed in 5 minutes by a doctor, just using the Connors Sheets. Where can I have her tested for this disorder? I know if I bring this to the School District they will think I crazy.

I do not know where you live but if you check with her pediatrician, he could certainly provide some referrals for a neurophysc evaluation. You are right, if she only does it when she goes to school then she could also be suffering from some anxiety issues as well. Good luck

Have you considered that your child possibly has Asberger's Syndrome? My son was in that same boat, but we got the A/S diagnosis along with the ADHD we already knew of. It could answer a lot of questions for you. Check into it. Also, there is a book titled "The Highly Sensative Child"..... read it- maybe it's what your child is too.

I recommend that you VOLUNTEER in the classroom to see what is actually happening vs asking the teacher for the haps. I learned so much about the way my son's teacher actually treated students when I chaperoned a field trip.

No my child does not have AS. The problem is isolated to school only

That is a great idea! I know my husband learned alot about her 2nd grade teacher. He thought the teacher was right about our daughter until he volunteered and saw what a controlling up tight type of teacher she was. He actually got yell at by her for not volunteering correctly. I know this 4th grade teacher is very strict and takes everything personal. I may just pick a day a volunteer. I struggle with this because my daughter is a competitive ice skater and has a coach that knows how to appropriately push her and has made a fabulous skater out of her. She does not have any problem with her. I believe it is this teacher's approach of get work done that is causing the problem and possibly isolated her from the peer group.

Hi,I have gone through samething with my 13 year old daughter.I believe it has to do with being so shy.I struggled with schools since the 2nd grade.I have put her in Connectons Academy and I will let you know how she does.I know she was in band,cheerleader,nordic cross country skier,then she gave up and fought me and her dad every day ,she hated school.

That is the only way to get a true picture of what is going on. Be involved. I wish more parents had the chance to volunteer and see the REAL PICTURE of what happens through their children's school day. I gaurantee you things would be much better for the kids with more parent involvement in the classroom for that reason alone! Good luck to you guys.

Something is happening to her at school. get to the bottom of it ASAP.

My heart goes out to you skatingmom as I am dealing with the exact same issue already with my 1st grade daughter. I would like to do something about it NOW before it gets any worse. This topic hits really close to home for me as I, like your daughter hated elementary school when I was little due to being a Caucasian in an predominantly African American school. However, this is not the issue that could possibly be causing my daughter's dislike for school. I have read through all the posters who have answered and I think I will try my best to volunteer as much as possible. Good luck with that champion of a daughter of yours. I wish public schools would address the bullying with the same vigilance that they due for their fund raisers, tardiness, & absenteeism.

Thank You!!! I wish the school would take a serious look at the bullying issue instead of pretending that it is not there. I just plan on any chance I get to go into this classroom I plan on being there. There more my daughter talks the more I understand... she made a comment last evening that she needed new school supplies like markers ad scissors and I brought all those things for her and extra ones and they are gone because the kids BORROW her things and don't give them back. They basically use her, but because she quiet and not a behavior problem the school assumes she is fine when she really is not. It is sad to know that every morning I am sending her to war zone. I really don't have any answers, we don't have any other private schools around our area. My biggest fear will come when she is in 7th grade when she has to go into the Jr High School which is 7-8th grade and there is 1600 kids. Yes 1600 kids in one building. I keep thinking home schooling is my only option. Thanks again for comment.