Where have the discipline in the school's system gone? Have the system failed the parents,or vice-versa?
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Parent Answers to "Where have the discipline in the school's system gone? Have the system failed the parents,or vice-versa? "
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Everyone.....Thank you for your replies. Based on everyone's replies, I guess it's the old saying "coming back to haunt them". Hmmm? Could it be that the system was just too soft on discipline? Or maybe we, as a whole, have lost our way? These ain't the days when a handshake really meant something, the rules are a lot more weaker, and not to mentiion, kids to pre teens and up are a lot smarter. They say the IQ raises every generation. So shouldn't the laws evolve to?
To be honest, I agree we live in a society where there are more single parents than before, not to mention (but I'm doing it anyways), the pressures one faces as one. No real time with the kids. If there is, it's not enough. I believe we all hold fault to the reluctanct subject. We must, if we are to succeed, grow and change with the times, to keep up. We have to get out of the horse-and-carriage mentality, meaning, the law for children and up was strong at its time. But we underestimate the children and their evolution.
However, to be blunt, the system stopped caring because the disciplinary actions were thrown out the window by parents as well. So when you send a child or pre-teen to school with all of these behavioral problems, the teacher(which is rare nowadays), takes it as "I'm not getting paid enough to raise your child." So at this state, the child sees this as neglect and finds "alternative groups" to feel the care they yearn for. The school system is supposed to secure the right rules to attend a secure, caring school. However, me as a parent have to do my part as well. Thank you all for your input. You just don't know how refreshing it is to find a website that promotes progression.
To be honest, I agree we live in a society where there are more single parents than before, not to mention (but I'm doing it anyways), the pressures one faces as one. No real time with the kids. If there is, it's not enough. I believe we all hold fault to the reluctanct subject. We must, if we are to succeed, grow and change with the times, to keep up. We have to get out of the horse-and-carriage mentality, meaning, the law for children and up was strong at its time. But we underestimate the children and their evolution.
However, to be blunt, the system stopped caring because the disciplinary actions were thrown out the window by parents as well. So when you send a child or pre-teen to school with all of these behavioral problems, the teacher(which is rare nowadays), takes it as "I'm not getting paid enough to raise your child." So at this state, the child sees this as neglect and finds "alternative groups" to feel the care they yearn for. The school system is supposed to secure the right rules to attend a secure, caring school. However, me as a parent have to do my part as well. Thank you all for your input. You just don't know how refreshing it is to find a website that promotes progression.
Great question. There's been a general breakdown of discipline in society - since the 1960s we've celebrated individuality in this country. I celebrate it too but the 60s left an uneasy legacy - 'do what you want to do', 'do what feels good to do'.
And - many parents these days are just plain too tired when both of them come home from work at 7 in the evening - families can't spend the same kind of time together as they once did. And neighbors don't play the same role anymore - my neighbors were quick to tell my mother of anything I did wrong in their backyards. We are simply not the communities that we used to be and it does take one to raise children well.
We're rather an angry society too - any neighbor who'd call with a tale to tell might wish they hadn't. We don't have the same unquestioning respect that we had once for authority including our schools and the teachers in them. Some teachers who try to discipline wish they hadn't - they end up with a fight on their hands from parents.
It's not easy - it's not easy for schools to lay down the law - parents can protest - and what can a school really do? A public school cannot throw kids out - the ultimate punishment. Some kids would love to be thrown out too but they can't be.
I've said before and will again - our schools are Way too large. Schools have not changed with the times and they need to - society's institutions should change to meet the changing needs of society. We need smaller schools and we need schools of choice - schools that families and children have chosen together so that they have 'buy-in' into the school - they actively want to be there and so will try to conform to the school's expectations.
It's a two way street- schools and families alike are at fault but if society's hospitals are expected to cure us when we're ill, we should expect society's schools to rule the kids even if they're ill-willed.
And - many parents these days are just plain too tired when both of them come home from work at 7 in the evening - families can't spend the same kind of time together as they once did. And neighbors don't play the same role anymore - my neighbors were quick to tell my mother of anything I did wrong in their backyards. We are simply not the communities that we used to be and it does take one to raise children well.
We're rather an angry society too - any neighbor who'd call with a tale to tell might wish they hadn't. We don't have the same unquestioning respect that we had once for authority including our schools and the teachers in them. Some teachers who try to discipline wish they hadn't - they end up with a fight on their hands from parents.
It's not easy - it's not easy for schools to lay down the law - parents can protest - and what can a school really do? A public school cannot throw kids out - the ultimate punishment. Some kids would love to be thrown out too but they can't be.
I've said before and will again - our schools are Way too large. Schools have not changed with the times and they need to - society's institutions should change to meet the changing needs of society. We need smaller schools and we need schools of choice - schools that families and children have chosen together so that they have 'buy-in' into the school - they actively want to be there and so will try to conform to the school's expectations.
It's a two way street- schools and families alike are at fault but if society's hospitals are expected to cure us when we're ill, we should expect society's schools to rule the kids even if they're ill-willed.
The parents have failed the kids. This starts at home. Children these days are raised by young, single women who don't always do the right thing when it comes to raising the children. Fathers are missing from the households leaving everything (working, cooking, cleaning, washing clothes, etc.) to the Mom. How much quality time does she have if she's working 50+ hours a week so that there's a place to live and food on the table. It's a bleak situation that we need to stop getting ourselves into. Let's face it, the decision to have a baby out of wedlock to a man/boy that refuses to help, is 100% our decision.
Great discipline in the public schools, San Francisco private school kids out of control.
I personally believe it's both...the system failed the parents AND the parents failed the system. I was a product of the school system when corporal punishment was allowed and while it wasn't the most fun, there was order and a lot more learning went on. I'm not saying that's the only form of discipline but then the system just stopped doing anything at all when it couldn't paddle them. Then parents stopped being supportive of teachers when it came to the rules and regulations being enforced, or who was right or wrong ("Oh, my TImmy COULDN'T have done THAT...") and Timmy did that and more. It's an all around failure and it's showing up all over the place, not just in school. In the mall, at church, in the grocery store. And it's sad.
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