When your child has a big red X on their forehead - what do you do??

My son has attended the same school since K-garten and it seems the principal has marked him from day one. Everything they have asked me to do I have done yet they do not offer much assistance on their end - legally my son qualifies for an IEP however they will not give him one. We are now on our 4th therapist on the advice of the school HOWEVER none of them agree with the school so I am told to find another one. My son is advanced educationally and our problem seems to be more of a discipline problem (almost tit for tat) - any suggestions on who to talk to in the school system. I am to the point of calling my attorney as well as the school board as it is apparent that we are at an impass. My son is miserable and HATES school and I spend a lot of time emailing teachers and making phone calls when I should be working. HELP!!!!!!!

Parent Answers to "When your child has a big red X on their forehead - what do you do??"

View 16 answers: Newest-Oldest, Oldest-Newest
Display all answers

I represented an autistic student at his IEP with a home health service, and was furious with the discipline slips presented by his so-called "aide" and the constant flow of at-work-interruptions to his parents during the school day. I have worked as a Resource Aide for Washington Township Schools and am aware of the responsibilities these staff have accomplished while I was there in 2003-04 - hired psychologist in one school, incredible dedication, with prevention of behavior and accomplishment of assignments, pride, and documented improved social interaction, with accounts of fewer student trips to the principal's office. Ask for records of his aide and then carry these "behavior slips" to the superintendant - staff is not trained if there is no log of work completed, supplemental projects, with positive changes in the student's school day. etc. Don't ask, demand an aide if you believe your student is in danger, or endangerment to others, and look into their track record. Staff should have these matters settled early in the school year if they are doing their jobs and earning their paychecks. Non-sufficient cause for IEP is often used as a SMOKE SCREEN for corralling special needs populations out of certain schools for "trouble free school stereotype" (surrounding real estate market values and parental social cliques), non-accountability with the State (paperwork and no supportable staff willingness trained on behavior improvements), and actually spending allocated federal funds on its cause - student populations in need of 1:1 adult supervision, not "downtime in trailers" as one school district laid on me while working as a substitute teacher (disgusting & appalling) during the school day.

Attending an IEP was in itself stunning for stereotyped and inaccurate allegations of current student status with misconduct carried over from previous IEPs, with staff "self-identity" in stacks of Pink Slips and low grades accumulated in one full school year, without mention of 12-year-old depression, social withdrawal and very few absences.

Of generous per pupil ratio of state funds, every student deserves more for attendance than years of "pink slip" familial-threat "disciplinarian style" education-supplements and daily house calls of complaining staff. IEPs provide for 1:1 aides, and where supplemental assistance is obviously needed, would contact the State Superintendant's office and find out school-district distributions of these funds, and if they are not distributed on "demographically targeted schools".

-low paid, and pestilential on the side of kids-in-closed-door-classrooms

You say "My son is miserable and HATES school."

That quote should give you your answer. You need to find him a new school.

If your son's only classification is gifted, you will have to look at state regs since gited is not covered by any federal protection. You must look at your state's rules and regs to see if ADHD can be a reason for an IEP. If you can get an IEP through the ADHD route, you will have more power and protections under law. If an IEP is not available, ADHD can get a 504 plan.

great link healthy11, she can also use a legal aid attorney in her area to help her find an attorney that specializes in educational discrimination, even if she doesn't qualify for free legal assistance they can help her find an attorney in her area by referral through a list of attorneys they keep that deal in specialized areas such as this. she can also try the justice department child advocacy center in her area by going through either the department of human services or the juvenile court clerk. another avenue might be the aclu or a disablity attorney. I'm not sure if this qualifies as a civil rights violation but it certainly seems it might come close enough for an organization like this to take an interest. Also contact a state or federal representative regarding the no child left behind acts and the special rules about public schools that receive public funds and any school that doesn't adhere to them risks loosing federal funding. It has several sections specifically about special educational needs. Unfortunately the state school board doesn't take an interest in the daily activities of public schools, though I also had to ask them why not. There is no reason why the school should refuse to evaluate the child through an iep. Just because the kid is smart doesn't mean he doesn't have special needs. With the proper documentation she may have the beginnings of a law suit on her hands.

disgusteddad, it sounds, from FedUpMom's original posting, that she has already had her child evaluated for learning and attention difficulties by private professionals (pediatricians aren't generally qualified to evaluate for LDs) and yet her school is denying their recommendations for an IEP.
She might try finding a special education attorney or advocate from www.copaa.org/find/index.php

1 2 3 4 Next >

Any contributed content above is the subjective opinion of that member or external author, and not of GreatSchools. GreatSchools does not check for accuracy in community posts or verify the contributor’s identity. If you are searching for health-related advice we strongly suggest you seek professional medical support. View our Community Guidelines for more details.

Local Q&A

Top cities

Los Angeles	Phoenix
Houston	San Diego
Chicago	Dallas
San Jose	San Antonio
New York	Miami

Browse questions about

Local Q&A is brand new! What do you think? Give us your feedback in our feedback forum.