How does grandma and mom explain to our 3 year old grandson, son that dad moved out of state.
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Dad does not seem to think he needs to tell him anything. The child is only 3 and advise would be great
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Parent Answers to "How does grandma and mom explain to our 3 year old grandson, son that dad moved out of state."
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Hi sweetestaboo,
There is not much else I could add to valleymom5's great answer but some groups that you might want to consider joining that could give more idea's or insight are as follows :
Step families (many people are in your situation)
Ex Friends (a great group with ideas on how to get along with your ex partner)
Father's For Equal Rights (may offer up some ideas on how to get dad to talk to your son)
I know almost exactly how you feel in this situation. My step son is six and still does not understand the distance between CA (where is mother lives) and here in AZ where he lives with his father and I. Whenever they speak on the phone he always tries to get her to come over real quick as if she still lived down the street.
I agree with valleymom5 I would not at this age tell him very much it will only make the situation more confusing for him. We gave J minimal details until he turned five and even then he had tons of questions that we struggled to answer. Some where "why don't mom and dad love each other?" "how come they never had married rings?" That was what he called our wedding rings. Our counselor helped answer some of them for him but books helped too.
There is not much else I could add to valleymom5's great answer but some groups that you might want to consider joining that could give more idea's or insight are as follows :
Step families (many people are in your situation)
Ex Friends (a great group with ideas on how to get along with your ex partner)
Father's For Equal Rights (may offer up some ideas on how to get dad to talk to your son)
I know almost exactly how you feel in this situation. My step son is six and still does not understand the distance between CA (where is mother lives) and here in AZ where he lives with his father and I. Whenever they speak on the phone he always tries to get her to come over real quick as if she still lived down the street.
I agree with valleymom5 I would not at this age tell him very much it will only make the situation more confusing for him. We gave J minimal details until he turned five and even then he had tons of questions that we struggled to answer. Some where "why don't mom and dad love each other?" "how come they never had married rings?" That was what he called our wedding rings. Our counselor helped answer some of them for him but books helped too.
Keep it simple, he is only three. (And, I guess I am just assuming this move is more as a step toword ending your marriage, and that you are not going to be joining Dad when the house sells.) My youngest was three, when our divorce happened and I hung back and let them ask the questions first and kept the answers short as well as simple. If they want to know more they will ask. Distance mean nothing to a three year old, let alone the complexities of why Mommy and Daddy, don't live together anymore. It will be hard to keep your emotions at the very least neutral, but, this is what is best for your child. Use Grandma, other relatives and friends, as your sounding board, as well as support for yourself. You will need that now! Ask her to also let your child take the lead with questions too! This is only the begging of the responsibilites that you will shoulder as the Parent. I am guessing (assuming) again, that your husband has left you to pick up the pieces many times. Be strong! and Good Luck.
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