Hi Anon,

I'm in California, too, and all I can say is we've been selling giftwrap and plenty of other things since 1995, when my son started kindergarten. Often the top three kids get very exciting prizes, but we've never been in the position (nor had the inkling) to hit up friends for $1000 in sales stuff.

Most of these programs use an incentive-based program to get kids to sell, all the way up to very expensive prizes. The kids are encouraged to sell to relatives, neighbors, friends, members at church, and anyone they know. So even if a family is not financially able to spend the money themselves, they can seek support of their social circle.

It can be worse, as some schools ask for a flat-out donation of several hundred dollars per student/family/etc. to defray costs of providing a well-rounded education. And there are plenty of families that can't fork out that kind of money.

Programs in public schools must be voluntary, so if the program really bothers you, let your child know why, and don't participate at all.

As for what it's teaching the kids, is the bottom line is a "public" education is the bare-bones minimum standard, and to create a well-rounded student a lot more money must be raised for assemblies, field trips, enrichment activities, and the things that make school "memorable."

I know a little about this fundraiser since I am from Six Mile as well. I believe the paper that was sent home mentioned that the student had to sell one card but the school preferred that each family bought 2 cards and the student would be able to go see a reptile exhibit. I don't know exactly who or why they made this decision to do it this way but Six Mile has done this since my daughter has been in school.

I understand your frustration and totally agree. Our children attend school in a suburb of Oklahoma City. I had the same issue with our PTO. Children who sold over a certain amount of PTO fundraiser junk were allowed to attend a "Big Blast Party" and those who didn't meet the quota were not allowed to attend. I also felt this was very unfair and that the PTO was making money at the expense of childrens' feelings. I personanally believe that a child who was unable to sell anything probably worked just as hard or even harder than those who sold many items. My husband and I spoke with school Superintendent about the PTO's insensitivity towards the students and their families. As a result, he met with every principal in the district and informed them that money made from fundraisers should be a school wide goal and that if the school meets the goal, all students will be allowed to attend the "Big Blast Party". The school principals took the message back to their school PTO's and now if the PTO school fundraiser goal is met all students are allowed to attend the party. Maybe you should address the PTO Board and Principal about their unfair practices and if they are unreceptive, see if you can schedule an appointment to meet with the Superintendent of your school district. I do not believe in making money at the expense of hurting a child's feelings.

I couldn't agree more, shades of "The Chocolate War"! However a lot of these fundraisers only have these type of events as options, and it is the school's (or PTO's) decision to participate. In our old community all the schools did the Innisbrook wrapping paper fundraiser. They offered all sorts of contest/incentive options, many of which excluded most participants, focusing only on something like "Party for the $1000 sellers". Some of the schools in the area participated, but ours did not, for which I was grateful!

As a former PTO president, I would recommend that if you have a group of parents who are concerned or dissatisfied with these types of fundraisers, you should go to your PTO/PTA and/or the principal. Ask if your school could still participate in the fundraising program without the contest hype? Usually you can, and schools typically make nearly the same amount of money regardless of incentive participation. If not, research alternatives - these events can be huge money makers for schools, and before you suggest eliminating it, it might be helpful if you have some ideas for another option.

without knowing both sides........perhaps they were just trying to give insentive to the kids to sell 2 cards instead of one or none?

It does sound unfair, but somewhat typical. Most commercial fundraising companies have their own incentive programs and they often include something like a party or limo ride.
I can't help you with this current fundraiser, but I want to point out that this decision was made by your PTA/PTO board, probably with very little parental input because everyone was too busy to participate. Go to the meetings, ask thoughtful questions, get involved and learn what's really going on. Better yet, bring a few friends, join the fundraising committee, and make things happen for next year.
Personally, I hate these types of fundraisers, but a lot goes into the decision and we don't take it lightly. Find out what's going on in your PTA/PTO and go from there. Good luck.

What you have stated is another reason why there should be a school wide goal rather than individual or classroom goals. Why should those who attempted to sell this junk without success be punished? Many parents, regardless of income, feel pressured into buying things that they don't need and can't afford. Younger children really don't understand why others are getting something that they aren't even if they tried just as hard or harder than those who did sell many items to their parents and relatives. Schools and PTO's know that they are pressuring parents to buy fundraiser items and don't really care if they hurt childrens' feelings in the process. In fact they know this will happen, thinking parents will buy this junk so their child will get the first level prize at the very least. I don't think there is anything wrong with giving the top 3 sellers or so some sort of separate gift. However, everyone should feel included. Unfair fundraising tactics is probably one of the major reasons why parent groups complain about low parent involvement. I have also fallen into the trap of buying fundraiser junk so my children won't have their feelings hurt or be embarrassed.

My children stopped selling anything because of time and we felt we were forcing some people to buy things they did not want.

In my school district they give prizes to the top sellers. The packet my daughter returned last week, they requested a minimum sell of ten boxes of "cookies" yes, cookies. Each box cost $14.00

We always returned fundraiser packet with donations ranges from $46.00- $100.00. Also, we subscribed all our family magazines through this medium. Many families are preferring donation than selling stuff and in some case school gets more money this way.

I agree public education needs money espeically in the areas of "special treat for teachers" and books.

My daughter talks about the prize and I use every pportunity to discussion how things work in our family and how the real world works around prizes.

As others suggested, join the PTO and do what you think is best for your family and your child.

Best wishes!

As stated by 1seremen, I also agree that public education needs additional funds.
Even though I view the PTO as necessary evil (constant fundraising and constant pressure), the profits received from fundraisers do benefit the students.
I am also a member of the PTO and have, through some of my constant complaining to the PTO board, school principal, and superintendent about unfair fundraising, opened their eyes to their previous distasteful and insensitive practices.
Two years ago all of the school PTO's in our district changed from individual goals to school wide goals.

Now if a students meet the school wide goal, all of them may attend the "Big Blast Party". The top 3 sellers receive an additional incentive as well. No one is excluded.

I know that the people who organize these things have the best intentions possible but it sounds like they didn't think of everything. I agree with you that by doing so some kids are going to feel left out....the school probably won't be able to do anything about it now but it wouldn't hurt for you to air your concerns to the Principal and the PTA. If parents don't speak up, it will happen again.

If I were you, I'd talk to my kids, too, and tell them that they are just as important as those kids who sold and won prizes, etc. They shouldn't feel bad about it as I'm sure they won't be the only ones who will not qualify. The most important thing is to always remind them of how important they are to you---regardless of everything else.

Goodluck!

I didn't like the selling of candy or cards at school. It was hard on children who didn't come from a large family network, or some parents just bought a huge chunk so that didn't teach the child anything except to say, " Look how much my mom and dad paid, what did your parents contribute"? There are other ways to raise money.

That is very unfair, and I would be fairly certain that you are not the only parent who feels that way. Some get stuck in the rut that if it is mandated by the school it must be tolerated. Find a gentle way to get your point across, suggesting another means of recognizing students and creating positive fundraisers at your school will help you feel more a part of things and allow other parents a safe way to speak where they may hesitate otherwise. Also talk with whoever heads the fund raising efforts at your school.I don't think it's a lack of humanity you are seeing, it is what I call runaway fund raising efforts, people do get so wrapped up in the sell sell sell nature of things they forget the reason behind it all. Good luck to you.

The schools have a budget, don't you think it's about time fundraising should have a budget set aside from you the taxpayer who pays taxes for the district your child attends. There are teachers who write grants for things your school needs. People are having it very very hard money wise with the economy as it is. Gas, food, electric, oil. Get the school the money by way of these areas instead of parents having to dig deeper into their pockets. Did this help?

This is such a pet peeve of mine. In our district we have a group of women that run the PTO and do not respond to the needs of the community. Then they wonder why it is difficult to get help?

Get aload of the fundraisers we are expected to participate in the efforts:
Candy/gift/wrapping paper sale from catalog
Harvest Festival where everyone must donate to a basket to be raffled
Market Day
Beach towels/bags sale at end of year
Pizza sale

It has reached the point that I wish they would just send me a bill in the beginning of the school year. The problem is that this is a high taxed district where the parents think money correlates with good education, that is not reality. To answer your question: I would discuss this with an Administrator if after discussing it with the parent's organization you do not reach a solution. A non profit's job is to respond to the needs of the people they serve. In this case and many others, the PTO does not respond to the communities needs, but the board's agenda. That is a problem. Most people do not mind an occassional fundraiser or incentives. However, when the fundraisers or incentives become excessive where children cannot control the outcome, the organization is not serving its members.

I remember the school fundraisers when I was a kid, and I have kids in school now. The same incentives were offered then as now, in that you received prizes for reaching certain quotas. I really don't know how anyone can suggest that these things are done fairly, even when there are several prize levels. These fundraisers have the same premise as the pyramid schemes that are so infamous among adults. Sell more, be rewarded. But the kids who sell more do so because their parents take the order form to work with them. My parents never would, and I always felt like the loser kid because of all the kids with packed order forms from their parents' coworkers. These days, I buy a couple of things from each kid's form and call it good. Fortunately, their school this year decided instead to have a carnival. Everyone in the school worked on different things or donated money in order to have items to auction and prizes for games. Then we all went and played. We gave to our own school, in a manner that gave something back to everyone.

It was a nightmare for me because my son has ADHD and kept losing all the carnival games, but I guess I prefer having him lose in a straightforward way (so that he can work on dealing with disappointment and keeping his temper) to having him come in last in an unfair sales competition. I don't grudge the schools the money, just the method.

I wish that PTA's would spend less time fundraising and more time writing grants to get real amounts of money. Selling wrapping paper will only get you so much. If the school NEEDS something, apply for it. My mom writes grants for her school and gets tons of money every year. The school my son attends doesnt even have someone who writes grants. They leave it up to a teacher who may or may not take the time to apply.

I am coming at this discussion from 2 different angles. One as a mom and the other as the owner of a fundraising organization.
When our son was in elementary school we started sending in money during fundraising time with the stipulation that we did not want to order anything, just for the money to go to the school. This was hard on our son as he would not get to participate in the "BIG" prize packages. We resolved this by having him do extra chores, since he would have had to go door to door to sell this junk anyway, and then we paid him for his hard work and took him to the store to pick something out. I personally would have liked to get a little something in return for my donations but overpriced wrapping paper and horrible tasting chocolates I can do without.
F.Y.I. Our fundraising organization focuses on our local schools so that we can provide personalized customer service but there are other ones out there, with less unique products, but still better than the candy, cookie dough, wrapping paper garbage. If you are interested visit our website and then email me and I can let you know the names of the companies that work nationally. Our site is www.worksofartnc.com
Regardless, the schools need our money one way or the other in order to provide what is not in the budget.