Wow 7! I teach kinder in public school, what is he struggling with???? Why do they want you to keep him in kinder????

My son has a birthday Sept 17th, in my state you need to be 5 by Sept 1st. He would have to wait a whole yer to attend a public school.I signed my son up at a private school, there the child needs to be 5 by October 10th. He got excepted to go to the school. He is excited to go to school, and I feel he is ready to take on more learning skills than what he already knows. I think a parent does know more about their child than a teacher or anyone else. I have had many thoughts in my head whether to send him to kinder. or wait. I came to the final decision to send him. I figured, YOu will never know how the child will adjust in Kinder. until he actually goes. I am a strong believer of "everything happens for a reason". This private school is on a waiting list only. He got accepted for a reason and I know he is going to do very well.

My suggestion is for you to do what you feel is right for your child. The evaluator is going on book sense. Every child is different. Children are like sponges. Whatever environment they are continuously exposed to, they will adapt. Going forward has always been my motto. I'm in NY. My daughter will be 5 in October and she's starting Kindergarten this September. My son is 3. He will not be 4 until April. If the school would accept him in Pre-K, he would definitely be going. Don't hold your baby back.

Did that teacher give you reasons for her recommendations to have your 6 yr old son in Jr. K? Jr. K is usually for younger children who are not ready for Kindergarten or for K-aged students who are not academically or socially/emotionally ready for K.
I would ask her to explain and then you have to decide whether to put your son in K in another school.
He has one whole year of K to grow and learn, so I wouldn't even worry about the teacher's prediction of his being behind in 1st grade, when that's at least a year away! I had a similar problem with two teachers labelling my oldest as "learning disabled" when she was only three. I fought to change her teachers and classes because my gut feeling was to not believe that my daughter was "slow." Now she's five and entering kindergarden and is academically and emotionally ready. A good relationship with a capable teacher is so important. Go with your instincts and imagine yourself in your son's shoes. Good luck with your decision.

Dear anonymous, Wow...6 should be old enough. You need to understand exactly why she is recommending this. Was there a behavioral issue that she hasn't discussed. I hate to be cynical but you might want to look at their boy/girl/age mix, sometimes the private schools design a specific mix. This is no secret. Ethnicity can also play a role.

I would take him to another school, have them evaluate him and see what they say. We also went the private school route and my son got tested a lot. Big decision. Too big to just go by one person's opinion. If he had one "off day" with her that is where she is coming from. Don't trust that the kindergarten teacher gave it a lot of thought, your son is just one of many she had to evaluate quickly.
At one of the schools, on the interview day, my son made friends in the lobby with another boy and long story short, they wanted to play with each other instead of getting with the program. The teacher recommended against him because of this. Later we heard from the school that they still wanted him but we were turned off by then. Everywhere else including the school he ultimately attended he had good experiences. Your son may have had an off day when the kindergarten teacher saw him. Consider that and don't let her be the last word.

I agree with brettsmom, it sounds a lot like "numbers" game to me. That's unfortunate. I teach in public school so things are very different, we take all kids that meet the state's required age for kindergarten (5 by Sept.1). I don't really understand why it is allowed to pick and choose students in private schools--why kids have to "make" the class. That's just me, though. I also question why the teacher would think that if your child went to kindergarten somewhere else he wouldn't be ready for first grade at her school. That is a very dangerous assumption to make given that she doesn't know much about your child.

I hope I haven't offended anyone but I think kids should be given a chance and shouldn't be "weeded out." I just don't think that is fair to kids. I think that if a child is of the right age to begin kindergarten and his/her parent thinks that the child is emotionally/socially ready to begin then they should be given the chance. The worst thing that could happen is that the child makes no progress all year (RARELY EVER HAPPENS!) and needs to repeat the following year (also rarely happens but isn't exactly the end of the world at such a young age).

Kids will suprise you with what they can do. I would be concerned if someone were already saying that my child would not be able to handle first grade curriculum when they haven't even had kindergarten yet. Just my thoughts :)

This child should be starting kindergarten or first grade -- not PRE-K. I don't get it. My kindergarten student that was retained the year before turned 6 in October of this past year..... so I don't understand him turning 7 (he'll TOWER over his classmates)... this child theorhetically is being retained a second time turning
7 in pre K
8 in K
9 in 1st
10 in 2nd
11 in 3rd
12 in 4th
13 in 5th
14 in 6th
15 in 7th
16 in 8th (I can't imagine many parents understanding why this child can drive 2 years before their own kids)
17 in 9th
18 in 10th
19 in 11th
20 in 12th ---- seriously!!!

I think if this is what you are being told the school officials that are telling you this need their heads examined -- I'm O.K. with 1 retention when appropriate .... but 2 is ridiculous.

This child should have already had a year of kinder ...... I'm not implying anything here about the parents, as I'm sure the school is the reason for the wait.

Read www.slate.com/id/2196423/. Very interesting article about holding children back. Do some more research on the local public schools and their curriculum, don't take the private school's word. It behooves private schools to set older cut-offs. They don't have to deal as much with behavioral issues that are appropriate for the age group and they can concentrate on the requiring the children to sit for longer periods of time and concentrate on academics. This approach is also not a great way to learn for this age group they learn better by doing hands on. By the way I am all for rigorous academics, when the children have been prepared, and their development has been taken into consideration. Do what is best for your child ren, and your family. Unfortunately, those choices are not always the easiest nor the most convenient.

Wow...well, that Slate.com article is certainly anti-redshirting. In my son's case, the die was cast last year when we had to make a decision before he turned five and we held him back and put him in pre-K instead of kindergarten. I don't know...every school (yes, they were private schools molding their classes) said the same thing.

I have a question. Can a child be transferred from private school to a public school. Private school accepts students 5 by October and Public is 5 by September 1st. Can they go half the year to private and then transfer to a public? They cannot deny the child can they?

You could give it a try you might get away with it, but generally I'd say no. The public school would deny your child's entry based on birtdate. I'd reccommend if you really think your child is ready for kinder. Go to private school for kinder & then start first grade in public school the next year. When enrolling kindergartners schools really look at that birthdate, in first grade they look for evidence that a child completed kindergarten

Unfortunately the answer is No. I live in Houston and I did some research on that because my son turns 5 Oct 20th! He is not eligible for K-5 since he is not 5 by Sept 1st. I felt it was holding him back because he known his colors and shapes since he was 3! I had to place him back in a daycare setting that focused on a cirriculum so he wouldnt get bored. I found a private school that allows him to enter k-5 if he is 5 by Nov. I thought great, I could just transfer him to public school for 1st grade after this school year. I then went to my public school districts site and they said that to be eligible you have to have attended K-5 in a public school in either that same state or another. You stil have to match the birthday guidelines! I was just told from the private school that they really prepare the kids so a lot of the kids just test up to the next grade when they transition from private to public.

I think the article is great. I guess I am a little confused because I would expect a private school to be a more strict enviroment thant the public schools. Afterall isn't that what the tuition rate is for? We want discipline, education and structure. I would think that is a great thing when it is reinforced in the home also. The kids that are pushed and placed in the direction of education are the ones who go to college for free! I dont know about you, but that is what I want:) There is a time for play and there is a time to learn, I think sitting down and focusing is a necessary evil. Sometimes we have to focus on the long term benefits of what may seem to hard now.

I think it depends on the state ..... our state would allow you to start 1st if your child had kinder the previous year ...... regardless of birthdate otherwise your kid would never be able transfer from private to public school if they constantl referenced a birthdate. The public school would constantly try to make your kid "repeat" a grade each time you tried to make the switch. To me it doesn't make sense????

I know what you mean. It doesnt make sense. I guess it all starts in Kinder. You cant advance to 1st grade in a public school in Texas unless you have been in Kinder in a public school. I guess one would have to pay for kinder and 1st grade in a private school setting then possibly they would allow you to enter 2nd grade. I just think the whole b-day rule holds a lot of kids back.

Semaj1202,

Hmmm....I would call the school district or your local school directly for clarification on your child's ability to transfer. I think Kennysmom is right, if your son has finished K from an accredited school anywhere he should be able to transfer. Otherwise, no one would be able to transfer from private to public or even public to public in different districts. In fact, he should be able to transfer during the second semester of the kindergarten year from the private school because by then he will have passed the birthday cut off in the proper grade.

A young relative of ours needed to transfer during the middle of the school year from one school district that had different age requirements than the one he was transferring to. The website and the district office implied that he couldn't do it but when his mother went to the receiving school in person with his transcripts there was no problem. Keep in mind too, at most schools principals have discretion on accepting who they want. This age thing can make you crazy!

Well the Bday rule is a guideline -- I think it would be better if all kids were asked to take a readiness test, because some kids even though they are 5 by the deadline are not ready to start school. Not every school assesses because of the funding required to give every incoming kinder a test so ..... it's easier to go by a birthday.

Kennysmom,

Even the readiness tests are biased towards being older. When my son did his readiness tests last year he tested between his then age of 4 and 3 months and 4 and nine months during the spring. He turned five in the fall and all of the schools said give him an extra year so we did. Basically, the schools here in LA, particularly the private schools, want the kids, especially the boys older. The public schools are more fluid. I've know kids one year older than my son who are now two years ahead of him in school becuse they entered school at 4 meaning he is entering K while they are entering 2nd and they are struggling.

Those 4 year olds made the bday cut offs by attending preschools that included a kindergarten or private/parochial elementary schools that have a pre-school or pre-k attached.

The private to public four year old transition is a common tactic used here to move kids along in to kindergarten. Sometimes it seems to be good for the child sometimes not. It definitely works if entering your child earlier is what you want to do.

Brettsmom- Thanks for the response. I will definately check that out once he turns 5. I really thought it was a shame when I read the districts website! I also dont want to continue to invest in private school rates if he can get good free education in the public schools. I live in Houston and the school districts are great in my area. It really seemed like a waste when I was told he couldnt be in kinder yet. I will definately look into mid semester. Thanks again

I know testing isn't always accurrate, but I'll tell you most of my late 4's and early 5's struggled with the whole concept of school when compared with their older peers in the same class. I just think by and large a readiness test is a better indicator of possible readiness then and age since kindergarten is much faster paced. A childs before school experiences play a huge role in their success in school. Do they play with play dough, or build with blocks, can they sit still while being read to, etc.... Many kids start kindergarten and never hold a crayon, scissors or a pencil. They've never seen paper and they've never been read to. For most of us it's hard to imagine, but I see it EVERY year.

you need to have the teacher explain why she feel your boy needs to stay in jr k or pre k. is it because the academic or for the long hours. Or because they are full in k but not in jr k.
My girl is born in january too, on the 4th, 02. She is going to turn 7 and she is in first grade starting tuesday. I know that sometimes they tend to hold boys back ...so they would be more mature but I think this is to much unless he has learning disability.
I would definitely have a second opinion before making any decision, and you need to make what is the best for your child without thinking how convenient would
be to have both kids in the same school.

Hi! We had the same experience with the private school that we first went into for my child's education. I have a 4-year old son and he's turning 5 in September. When we went to a private school last summer, the director had to put him into preschool. As per Virginia law, any child who is turning 5 on or before September should be in kindergarten. We asked this director if we could send our child to kindergarten but she tends to hold him. She said that normally the boys comprehend slower than the girls...I cant remember the exact words but something to that effect. They said that they usually send the boys to kindergarten a year later than the girls. Believing on what she said, we enrolled him. But it has always been an issue between my husband and I after leaving that school. We, as his parents, know the abilities of our child. If he would be repeating preschool, we're afraid that he might get bored in the class....which may result to a different attitude, he might not listen to his teacher anymore. What we did was we went to the nearest public school and have him assessed by the principal to know if he's ready or not. I remember, our child was not even assessed in the private school! The principal was so amazed as my child knows everything that he could learn in kindergarten. He can write his name, can recognize colors and shapes, can count up to 20 and he could read 3-5 letter words. The most important thing is he listens to everything the principal asks. The principal didn't have a second thought in accepting our application! She said she think our child is ready. Now he is enrolled in kindergarten, and we're waiting for our 2-month advance payment REFUND from the private school. Last Thursday, we attended the Open House and our child is more than excited to attend the kindergarten class. He actually doesn't want to leave his classroom on that day! Sorry but I have to tell that the facilities in this public school is a lot better to what we have seen in the private school. In my child's classroom, they have their own bathroom, computer area (they have around 6 computers), their own pantry (where the sink and drinking fountain are located), writing area, reading area....everything....you would'nt look for more.

To sum it all, we, as parents, know better the capabilities of our kids....if you are having second thought, go with your gut and try to seek for a second opinion or maybe third.

Dont focus on one school...just like what I did before....

I wish you the best!