Is a school change going to have a negative effect on my daughter?

Jodi thanks for the advice, we have recently visited the new school and walked the halls...so to say. She says she likes the school, and she even saw 2 of her friends from the old one! YEAH!!! (makes it a little easier). The school year begins in 3 weeks and I think she is excited, I asked her if she was still upset about switching schools and she told me that she will miss her teachers and friends but I believe she will be ok. Thanks again.
---Karen

I don't know if your daughter will negatively impacted. It is something that you will have to figure out on your own. We did something far more drastic, I moved our family, now 4th grade daughter and now 1st grade son, from Japan to the US. They were born in Japan (as was my wife) we moved to the US (I was born in the US) last year, so they have both completed 1 full year and starting their second year. So, they had one more situation where they spoke little English (that was totally my fault - I became fluent in Japanese so that is what I had used at home instead of English like I should have). The teachers and principal wanted to put my daughter in the 2nd grade, but her age made it right for 3rd grade. A bit of a fight to keep her in 3rd last year until I hinted at "no child left behind" and they backed down. In about 6 months into last year, my daughter moved from a low 1st grade reading/no writing/no speaking to low 3rd grade reading/writing/speaking. By the end of the school year she was level with her classmates. Now that she speaks English fluently, she has many new friends and still is in contact with her friends in Japan. She is now fully bilingual and has little problem switching. But she has a "never give up" attitude. Surprisingly, my son who was in Kindergarten had a bit harder time, I thought that since he had only been to nursery school that he would adapt quicker than my daughter.

The problem that I did not see is that he had a hard time expressing himself in either language, whereas my daughter could at least speak to us in Japanese to express herself. After starting 1st grade last week, he is now fine. So even in the same situation, children react differently and my son took a year whereas my daughter got used to the US in half a year.

Thus the negative impact is extremely hard to gauge. Since your daughter is going to be in 2nd grade, she might have a hard time expressing herself and you have to watch really closely. I think she is just starting to get her bearings (emotionally) about her 1st grade school and the unknown and not knowing anyone in the new school is very scary. She could just as easily enjoy the new school more, but not the first day, maybe not even the first month. You need to connect with other parents quickly, so that everything is comfortable outside of school.

I moved back to my old neighborhood and was an Eagle scout so I already had that familiar setting my friends are also parents (I was gone for 20 years - but visited more than 20 times). So, throughout the year, new friends and for me old family friends give many sources of exposure to see that it probably isn't so different after all and we changed cultural settings. You also don't need to let her know about your issues of moving around as a child. You are her rock right now and you cannot appear weak. If you go through "I understand because that's what I went through", you will not give a good strong base to stand on. In later years you can open that, but not right now. My wife had to change cultures too and leave friends and family behind, my family is here and I had to leave some friends behind, but I have friends here already. My wife did not let the children know her problems, I took the brunt of it and that at least makes us be the rocks in our children's' lives. Now everything is fine, and much more relaxed.

Hi
I can understand both sides of this dilemma! I was also a child that moved all around in school right up to high school. I guess the question you have to ask yourself is the same one that you asked for this blog, will it benefit her or hurt her? Another question is how much is she not being challenged?? Another question is do you plan on moving from where you are?? I mean do you rent or own??
Also social relationships are just as important as academic opportunities, especially at this young age. These are the two areas that are developing the fastest, their like a sponge in water, a child's mind is just grabbing everything.
I really don't want to sway you on this one way or the other, only you know what is best for your child.
But my advice would be find out why she is so upset, I suspect it is a friend thing. You and I know that friends come and go, but in 2nd grade they mean everything. I have 2 daughters myself and I don't give this advice lightly. I have asked myself if it were one of my girls what would I do?? And if this is driving her to tears and this is a "choice" and not a "have to" situation I would say let her stay in her at her home school, the academics will fall into line later. I don't want you to think that I put a lax in education, I believe in pushing them forward and doing the best they can, don't except anything less.
And please this is only advice, only you can make this kind of decision. I hope I have helped.
Thanks Jodi

Your daughter may have some emotional adjusting to do at first, but as she makes friends and settles in, she will feel more a part of her new surroundings. Parents are to make the decisions on where children go to school, they're the parents. Change is a part of life all your life, don't let a 6 year old make adult decisions. I went to many schools growing up in many different states due to my dad's job. I understood that it was my parents who made the decisions on where I was going to school, and it was my job to show up and do my best.