thanks for your information i will try that with my teen.this information was helpful.

ok, so this is an old post but I will reply anyway. I have two tweens, very close in age and the house is not big enough for them. We never had a problem until recently, beginning with the older child. After trying to curb her attitude which came about slowly but increased to the point of sheer madness for months, I finally was able to determine the solution. I started to evaluate myself as a parent, by allowing my child to spend time alone with her dad. While spending time with dad, I made sure to have him confirm all decisions with me. (that kept her in line, even when she was with him) normally, I did not have to ask if she behaved or not while with her dad. He readily told if she did not behave. We then discussed everything and I proceeded by going online to study the behavior to see if it was along the lines of what other kids her age do. It was! so I tried the different forms of punishments, only changing if something really did not work and each time she just got worst!
I did not give up. I know that she is very intelligent and she values her education, so I decided to approach her from that point. I had many discussions with her about her behavior. I also reminded her that kids are not the only ones that misbehaves and gave her examples of what happens to adults that do not behave. Whenever she told me that she did not understand...I reminded her that she behaves appropriately at school because she knows and follows the rules, gives respect to her teachers, follows exact instructions, listens, obeys and so forth. Now, I explained to her, I need you to do the same thing when you are home! when she continued to claim that she did not understand, I went online and pulled up everything that I could get on teaching children about proper behavior and when she came in from school....I pinned her down with a lesson on "CHARACTER EDUCATION"! she could not escape or excuse her way out of this one. I made her post it in her room and on her locker at school. I confirmed her understanding of each topic from RESPECT, TRUSTWORTHINESS ( everything listed) and I assured her that from now on, that this is the path that she must stay on. I pointed out to her that in order to stay on the path, she had to apply and live by her "Character Education" Anything outside of that and she is going to be in big trouble!
IT WORKED!!! she's on her way and I am right there to hold her accountable if she should even think of messing up. Ohhh she's aware now! So parents, get that Character Ed going, the sooner the better.

i agree tobbyandui,thats how we do our kids to.my kids hate it when we take their stuff away.but it shows them that mom and dad are the boss and wont tolerate any disrepect from them.

When we have something to say to her, she is not allowned to interrupt until we are done and if we request for an answer, simply, we don't allowed her to argue with us, we just set up the rules and if they are not followed or she gives an attitude, we take mostly what she likes the most, the computer, this seems efficient to us and it makes it clear to her that we don't tolerate any attitude from her.

thank cinderbell for your input i agree with you i think they all go through this stage .i guess if you look at it we did to.lol

This is a phase that many of us have gone through. The "what do you know" phase, the " eye rolling" phase, the "silent treatment" phase, the "anger phase". It is hard to judge how much to take, and yes, I do believe parents should take some this with attitude, children this age are finding out how to channel certain emotions that trigger these feelings within them.

When it becomes total disrespect or total anger is when it comes time to put your foot down. If the child in question is a "social butterfly", usually grounding does wonders. To do nothing but go to school, go home, do homework, do chores....this might do the trick that if they want freedom comes the responsibility of being respectful and and keep their attitudes to themselves.

Frustrating? yes...but I am sure many of us can remember doing the exact same things when we were their age:)

I've tried taking stuff from my teen but it doesn't faze her anymore.she just wont talk to me but will ignore me that makes me angry when she dose that are shell roll her eyes as if say whatever you want I'm not listening to you.

i know what you mean curlysue,my daughter gives me attude all the time and always says what do you know about being a teen i tell her that i wasnt always 31 that i was a teen once to.they treat you like you dont know aything.

That is not an easy question to answer I have been having the same issue with my kids. I dont get the rolling eyes anymore but I do get the tsk tsk. It's getting a little better but I'm getting tired of it quickly. They are to old to spank , and mine would prefer to sit in their room and read a book, ha ha. I believe it's a phase all children go through . I know this may sound mean but I give my kids the silent treatment . It seems to work for them, they will usually will come back and apologize.

What is the conversation about? When they can sit down and tell you what they want in a civil manner you will listen. Show you attitude will have items taken away. Show your teen you are there and listening.