My eldest daughter was in kindergarten when she was bullied. it was a very good, private kinder with a 1:20 student ratio. Theoretically two school yard supervisors were to be outside monitoring the kids when they were at recess; where they were that day, who knows.

I am recently called on by the media to comment on the incidents of bullying, and I do point out that this is happening at earlier and earlier ages. Too many kids are coming into the school system not learning that this kind of behavior is wrong, along the character foundations that PREVENTS these incidents to begin with.

While our schools are mandated to have some sort of anti-bullying policy and program in place, the studies will show you that in spite of hundreds of millions of dollars that are spent on these initiatives every year, the problems are not really getting any better. I believe a lot of it comes from treating the issue as separate and distinct from other things kids are learning in school. While we hope our students gain the skills they need at home, reality is we can't depend on that so efficient pro-social skills are needed in the schools.

Where they are implemented, they DO work. But not enough people have gotten to the point where they've had enough with knowing our child has a 1-in-4 chance of being the victim of school-based violence.

Until that happens, I don't see anything really changing because admitting what they've been doing isn't working and seeking solutions that DO aren't a priority for most schools yet.

As parent volunteers we had to take a class on what is expected on volunteers and watch a video on blood born pathegens. The principal of the school came in and greeted us, and made a coment that doesn't sit well with me. Her comment was "don't always believe everything your child comes home and tells you, this is only their version of the truth" WHAT??? Not to believe our children when they come home and tell us someone did something to them?
I'm sorry, in my opinion any involved parent will investigate any serious situation a child would come home and inform them of. If it was enough to alarm, scare or upset your child it is worth investigating.
In many cases, I am sure the principle is not even aware what's going on until a parent brings this to their attention. Is this opening the door for bullying in our school?

what I did when My daugher was in 3er grade is talk to the girl that was bulling my daugter and talk to all the teacher. that help I little bit. my next step was a parent to parent meeting which i didnt have to do because she stop bulling her. Even do she is bullying other kids. It is amazing what happen in our schools.

Although it helps to know that I am not alone in my problems with my child, it also saddens me that so many of our children have to endure this pain. My daughter has been bullied all year- physical and lots of name calling by other girls in her class. She is a 3rd grade special education student and the kids call her stupid. One girl told her that she was going to get the class stupid award and the rest of the girls laughed. She has been pushed for being a good runner and pinched because she was in the front of the line and the bully wanted to be there. She has never done anything to these kids. I run a girl scout troop and even some of these mothers don't invite my daughter to birthday parties and never to their homes.

The school does very little in terms of preventative measures. At this point in the school year, the outward bullying has stopped but the girls continue to whisper about her and exclude her. She has no friends and kids that used to play with her don't because she has been labeled as different by the bullies.

I have been trying to get the school to teach the kids tolerance and diversity but there has not been much done.

Both of my boys have been teased, bullied cause of their size. My oldest boy is 13 and is 5ft 9 in and 210 he isn't really fat. I don't know why my kids are teased and bullied. He doesn't take it anymore he stands up for himself, but I have had to police because of the bulling. Boys would grab him by throat and throw him at the age of 5. I wanted to go out there and beat those kids but I refrained my self. My youngest boy he is in the 4th grade and finally couldn't stand it anymore he stood up for himself and pushed the kid and the kid punched him in the face and my son punched him in the stomach and in the back. They both got suspended. I have talked to the school about this matter all they tell me is that he has to come into the office and write statements of the problems that have occur and they will take care of it after that. Well anyways back to the suspension. I took my son home that day and I called the school told them he wasn't going to return to school till I have had a meeting with the principle. Two or three days later we had a meeting we all sat down and she asked josh how could you have been prevented the fight. I said hold up he is the victim and he has tried to ignore it for a long time now I have told you people here for sometime now that there is going to be a day that he is going to stand for himself. She said we don't condone that behavior here. But you do condone it because the punishment that I have seen you do here is you shake your finger and make them sit on the bench WOW that's a punishment. She said NO we send them home for the day. Thats what they want to go home sit watch TV, play video games, and play outside. I think the parents that have bullies for kids should be take this more serious. Bulling really effects kid to the point of drastic measures.

My child is having this problem during school hours. I've met with the principal, and have talked to other moms who have gone/are going to the principal because their children are having a problem with this same child. What's frustrating to me and my husband is that there is no mention of talking to the child doing the bulling, or the parents of that child. Maybe the school intends to, i don't know? But it would be nice to know.
Bullies almost have more rights. And their "targets" are interrogated to the point that they don't want to tell adults anymore. I've never advocated physical violence...but it is a harsh reality that the only way some bullies stop is when confronted with what they put out. I know this from experience (being bullied). I know schools cannot advocate any type of retaliations, but they can teach about bullying, and they can make more severe consequences for the students and the parents of that student.
Which brings me to my last view...parents have to be held accountable for their children's actions (children under 18 that is). If schools would make parents accountable and face consequences, then we might see some change.
Thanks for listening to me vent. Stories, advice, and comments are appreciated.

This is hard Ive had to deal with it but only with the kids that ride on the bus with him and its always the older ones, Ive called the bus company about the behavior of the kids and mainly the way the bus driver handles these kids and they seemed to blow me off, so today after my 8 yr old came home in tears because of one jr. high girls calling him bad names I called the superintendant he was very nice and tried to help he called the bus garage and the woman from there calls me back and honestly she was not friendly what so ever it was just like talking to her last week about an incident, I felt like I was blew off so my only resort is to have to take them to and from school, its hard as a parent to deal with it, you wanna protect them but when their parents seem to act the same way they do what can you do?? I tell my kids to ignore them and dont show them it bothers them but its hard for them to do that. I will definitly be watching this discussion.

My son was bullied in the second grade. Small for his age and always a bit eccentric, the three biggest, roughest boys in his class would bully him when they were in the boys' bathroom - there's not often a teacher with the children when they're in the bathroom. They also put pressure on other children on the playground to have nothing to do with him. That too is certainly a kind of bullying though emotional rather than physical.
My son felt awful and did for years afterward. He didn't understand why they treated him that way - his good nature was baffled by someone being mean for no reason that he could see. I almost think it influenced his perception of people in general - he's a distrustful person and I often wonder if that didn't all begin in 2nd grade when he was bullied.

The school my son attended did not take an active stance toward bullying or toward the bullies. I agree with you - children who bully have issues and they need help with the issues that underlie their issue with bullying. The guidance counselor was more involved - the school didn't want the classroom teacher to 'take a side' a position that took me aback. As an educator, I see the classroom teacher as the person most capable of counseling the children and guiding them to different behavior. Children respond to their classroom teacher far more often and far more quickly than to the distant figure of a guidance counselor they barely know.
I wouldn't hesitate to put your ear to the ground and ask around of the mothers of the other children- how's school going this year for your child? Has your child complained of being picked on by any child in the school?

Kindergarten age children should never be alone - they should always be watched over. I think one reason schools can get very sneaky about bullying is that they know it shouldn't be happening. It says something about an elementary school when there is bullying at that school. Middle schoolers and high schoolers aren't watched every single second and don't want to be but elementary age children should be so watched over that no bully has even the chance to be.
Good luck with this - I hope you'll post back and let us know how it goes.