Need help writing a letter about acceptable interventions

 

My son’s teacher requested that I write her a letter letting her know what interventions I will allow her to use. Here’s a link to where all of this started: schwablearningforumarchive.greatschools.net/thread/26341.html Trying to make a long story short, and trying to catch up on what’s happened…. He was eventually counseled out of the accelerated program. The principal at the neighborhood school promised to do everything she could to help him out in the regular ed classroom. She promised a meeting with the teacher, the school’s counselor, us (the parents) and herself. She promised to continue with the evaluations and make sure they’re making accommodations blah blah blah. The meeting NEVER happened. On his first day at the neighborhood school I introduced myself to his teacher and let her know that I knew she was busy since she’d just come back from being off-track (year round school) but that I’d like to meet with everyone soon. She promised she would make it happen. Fast forward to parent teacher conference a month later. She scheduled our meeting during her dinner. By the time she found the school’s counselor and made it to the classroom we had about 5 minutes to talk before other parents starting waiting outside the room. She apologized and promised to talk to me later and I went with the school’s counselor to her office and continued our conversation. She had not met with my son and said that she could not do any testing of him unless she had a parent or teacher recommendation. She said the best she could do was give him social skills training once a week. I signed him up. The next day I called the front office and asked to put in a parent referral for an evaluation. They said it had to come from the teacher so I emailed his teacher asking for a resource referral. His teacher was terrible about communication. She rarely replied to my emails and never called. I was trying to be nice and not go over her head because I feared retaliation. In the end she blew me off until I couldn’t take it anymore.  I emailed the principal’s boss at the district and asked him to intervene. He said that because I didn’t take action until so late in the year (my email was in March but I was ignored until May) that they couldn’t do anything now but that they would have that meeting I requested before school started and that the evaluation would take place first thing in second grade. When we had our meeting (which I had to initiate, because again, no one contacted me) I met with a special ed rep from the district, the principal, a resource teacher, and his general ed teacher. I brought the “Tough Kid Book” with me because I wanted to discuss positive motivators. In the end they promised a thorough evaluation including achievement and OT tests because they didn’t give any of those last year. They brought a special seat cushion to help him stay in his seat (he has a diagnosis of sensory integration disorder), he was to be given a pencil gripper, special lined paper, his teacher was to tape off an area around his desk to help him remember his personal space, and she was going to write me a positive note in his daily journal (I wanted her to catch him being good). The first week of school was really rough. My son was being sent to the “badder box” every time he made noises, had trouble sitting still in his seat, or wasn’t completing work. I tried explaining that it couldn’t be a “badder box” because badder isn’t a word, but he was convinced he was being bad. He didn’t like that the other kids could send him there and he couldn’t make them go there when they were bothering him. On Thursday of the first week we had Back to School Night. I didn’t get a chance to speak with his teacher for very long but I did ask her to explain the badder box and let her know it was causing him great anxiety. She said it was a “batter’s box” and that it was his wiggle station. She said it was a place he could work while standing and that it wasn’t a punitive place. She promised to explain it to him and make it sound positive. He is no longer anxious about going to the batter’s box, but now when he goes there he sits under the desk, curls himself into a ball and covers his face with his hoody. He says he does this so the teacher doesn’t see him. She says it bothers her that he does this because what would other people think if they walked in and saw him this way? I come in every Friday to grade papers and bring his class a treat. His teacher and I usually discuss the grading of papers and not my son so I assumed he was doing ok this year. While I’m in the class the school’s resource teacher has come in to talk about the tests she’s giving him and let me know how he’s doing (exceptionally well once she can get him motivated to start).  Last year I was warned that he might not qualify for services because he’s bright. His biggest problem is that he just won’t do his seat work. A lot of the material he’s been doing so far this year is a dumbed-down version of what he was doing in the accelerated class last year. The vocabulary is the same, the reading comprehension tests are the same, and the spelling and math is easier. The units are similar (different teaching style) but the same concepts (this week they learned about seeds – he had a unit on them last year). Now on to my current issue; his teacher has started sending him to another classroom to complete his make-up work. She never told me she would be doing this and I only found out when I’d asked about his day and he told me he fell asleep in 5th grade. I pushed for details and he explained that when he doesn’t get his work finished he has to go to the upper grades and sit in a breezeway connected to their classroom and work alone. I asked if anyone is there with him and he said no. I asked if the other children have to do this and he said no.  Furious that he is working in isolation and no one told me I wrote an email to the principal, teacher and resource teacher and asked for status on the evaluation and an explanation. They promptly called me back the next day to let me know how the current interventions are going (not well because my son doesn’t like to be different) and said that the evaluation will be complete in two-weeks. They then went on to address what I referred to as “Seclusionary Time Out”. They said that another teacher is watching him, he’s in there for 20 minutes, and the have found it’s the only way they’ve been able to get him to complete his make-up work because every other place they’ve tried he wasn’t motivated to complete the work and get back to class. I asked about supervision and they said his teacher or her student teacher is always with him. I went home and spoke with my son. He disputed that anyone was with him and that he’s been caught falling asleep when they do come to check on him. He said he’s been moved there 6 times. I wrote an email to the special ed rep and principal’s boss at the district. I wanted to know if this was a common practice, if it is legal, if I should have been notified, and if this is appropriate for my son’s situation (as my understanding is that Seclusionary Time Out is for severe infractions, only to be used as a last resort when all other techniques have failed, that parents are to be notified first, parents should give their consent, and that it should be no longer then 1 minute per year of age). The district special ed rep called me back and said it is legal, and common practice and that they should have asked me first and that she wasn’t sure if it was appropriate in my son’s case. She said she wouldn’t be able to make the meeting in two-weeks but would be happy to take my calls and help in any way she could. I suspect my son will not qualify for services. If this is the case I will have no support whatsoever from the special ed or resource teams at the school (they only people that seem to know how to work with a kid like mine). The teacher (who does not have a special ed endorsement) will get to make the call on all behavioral interventions. She must have found out that I contacted the district because she called me last night. She said that she appreciated my help in her classroom and all that I do for her and she thought we had great communication. She said she’s been doing everything she was told to do based on our first meeting and wanted me to write her a letter letting her know exactly what I will and will not allow her to use with my son. I told her that I wasn’t even aware of what she was doing until I asked and she just barely started a new motivator with him and three other boys in his class this week after I spoke to the principal about her. I told her that I know she has a lot of other kids (22 are total in his class – 4 of them have focus/attention problems) and that what I want her to do will possibly take a lot from her. I just want her to be a positive presence. I want her to be nearby when my son isn’t completing work (he always does better with someone close-by even if they are not helping) and I would like her to gently remind him (put her hand on his shoulder) when he’s doing something that bothers the other students instead of pointing it out and removing him from his table. I want her to catch him being good and motivate him to do better with compliments instead of removing him from the room and the fun activites as the motivator to come back. She knows how sensitive he is to how others think and yet time and time again she makes him out to be different from the others. I want him to feel like he belongs. What can I write to her that will give her ideas on positive motivators that won’t be too much of a hassle (I don’t want her to resent him any more than she already does) and won’t put her on the defensive? I am certain I won’t be able to get a 504 or IEP because other than sensory integration, which isn’t a medically recognized condition, he has no other disabilities. Should I just have her send home the make-up work or have her fail him on it? I just want to get through the year without making him hate going to school or killing his sense of self-worth.