"Leave It at the Office"

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Balancing Kids, Work and Everything Else

I hear this all the time from people: "I always end up taking work home with me. I wish I could just leave my work at the office." It's kind of like that old saying when you wake up on the wrong side of the bed and tell yourself to "leave your bad mood at home."

Except that I'm better at leaving my bad mood at home in the morning than leaving my work at the office in the evening. Most nights, right before I head to bed, I make the mistake of checking my work email -- and next thing I know, over an hour has passed and I'm still wide awake, furiously typing away. (Thank God I don't have a Blackberry...yet!) When I lead this kind of lifestyle during the week, I usually end up exhausted by Wednesday.

How many of you deal with the same thing? For those of you who have successfully found some sort of balance, how do you make sure that the work day ends the moment you leave the office?

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Well, I have a Blackberry. I needed to connect immediately with my students. Because balance is so important in our home, however, I have learned to put it on "Quiet". That means I don't hear my text msg. tone, or e-mails. I am especially adamant about silencing it on Sunday evening. I could do better about leaving work at work. But what has helped is to make my todo list at work, short on each day, and leave it there, spread over the 5 days. When I am home, I must be open for whatever my kids & hubby want. Only if they are pre-occupied do I work on my projects--no more work though. That could be endless, and my guilt was too great. Make a way to leave work at work. Time with your kids is short and precious. Don't share it!

I do have a BlackBerry, but have found that it is much better to, when I get home, unclip it and put it on my dresser. Then, only after supper, bathing, pajamas, stories, and bedtime... Do I even worry about picking it up again... It is hard to do, but I figure that any request that comes in after hours can surely wait until 7 the next morning...

Hello I am new to motherhood and balancing a career. At one point in my career I was working for this company at least 6 days a week, some weeks 7 and working at least 10 or more hours a day. I was always bringing my work home along with the frustrations and stress. End result I left that job and when I did I never felt happier. I vowed that day that I would never invest THAT much into a job, that at the end of my shift is the end of my shift. I vowed Iwould never think about work once I am off, I refuse to check my emails (unless working from home) or my voicemails until I am back in the office. Adapting this habit I HOPE will allow me to be able to balance raising my daughter and maintaining my career.

Tina

I accomplish this by literally leaving everything at the office. If I dont' have access to it, I can't let it get in the way of my family time. I mentally think of my family time as another job only in the sense that I can't bring work from one "job" to another so it seems to work for me.

One of the few things I learned from my Ex-husband is how to just enjoy my kids. I watched my little 3 y/o daughter climb up on his lap one night with a book in her hand, while he was playing nintendo. He paused the game, picked her up and put her down on the floor without saying a word. She started climbing up his legs again. This time before she could get a foot off the ground he pushed her away saying, "no no Daddy's busy." Now that particular night I was frantically trying to clean out the fridge, fix dinner and get the table ready for dinner with my 2 y/o strapped to my chest in a baby carrier. Out of frustration I said, "can't you just read a book to her while I get this stuff done?" And then it hit me... he was physically pushing her away over a game. I wasn't physical with it, but I was doing the same thing over the household chores. We all get frantic over work because it pays the bills. Then we rush home to squeeze in 3 hours with our kids and we end up taking some of that time away from them too.

Now every time I think I should take a quick peak at my work email or make a business call during my family time I picture my Ex-husband pushing his most adoring fan away over a game.

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