First, thank you all for the feedback. While I stand by my belief that the teacher over-reacted, I now see this all in a new light. My solution was to talk to the teacher and principal to let them know how I felt about the punishment and how I thought this should have been handled. I then re-arranged my schedule so I could spend one day a week helping in the classroom. What an eye opening experience! My daughter goes to an all day kindergarten from 8:45 am to 3:30 pm, Mon-Thurs. There are 25 students in her classroom. There are no TA, para-pros and TOO FEW parent volunteers. Yes, the teacher over reacted, but now I understand how overworked she is. When I am there I am able to help her with students who need some extra attention while she works with other students who need more help. I actually feel very bad that I have not been doing this all year long. I feel so strongly about it that when ever I run into another parent I let them know how much this school system needs parents to be in the classroom, not just doing PTO and fund raising. And I have found being in the classroom to be very rewarding! I had no idea how much of a help I could be to my child as well as the children in my community by spending one day a week in their classroom. Before I step off my soapbox, I would like to encourage everyone to find a way to volunteer on a regular basis in your child's class.
That being said, I have had a chance to use said poster putty, and it is awesome. I found myself rolling it between my fingers. LOL :)

BTY- She will be attending a different school next year.

I would Not be ok at all with the red stars either - is that a common practice at the school? I think it's horrific and akin to branding criminals as they did centuries ago. If this is commonly done at the school, I'd try very hard to find another school. That the stars wash off is meaningless - it forces a child to go through their school day branded. It's an invasion of your daughter's privacy as well - no one including a child should be forced to allow someone to draw on their body.

That said - marshmellows are tempting and I guess the poster putty is too. For a young child, I'd treat that as a learning opportunity - we don't take things from the board. The board is there for all to enjoy and if we all took things from it, there'd be nothing left of it.
Children do lie - schools and teachers overreact to it. Children mostly lie out of fear - the marshmellows are missing and Teacher is Very Angry and asks in an angry tone 'who did this?" Or comes bearing down angrily on a child and says "You did this."
Children live in the moment - they don't plan like adults or see ahead into the future like adults. In the moment, to get out of the scary moment that it is, children lie. "It wasn't me, Teacher."
It does not reflect on a child's character or lack of it yet schools will treat children who've lied like a criminal (though I've never heard of one putting stars on a child's hands before)
I don't ask children why they lie - common sense tells us why a child lies. They don't want to be in trouble and so in the scary moment, they try to end it with a lie.
Sadly teachers then focus in on the lying rather than on the real problem which is - helping the child to learn what they need to learn from this situation. This is what school is supposed to be about - learning.
Your daughter should learn from this - not to take things from the board. What's interesting to me is that she did it three days in a row - does she really want poster putty that badly? Or what? Some children enjoy the negative attention - only people close to the situation can explain why your daughter's doing this.
Does she like school? I can't really think that a few stale marshmellows or poster putty are that attractive to her - to me it sounds more like she's interested in upsetting the board displays. Does she like her teacher and her classmates? Has anything like this happened before? I could certainly understand a child not liking a school that brands its students with marks on their hands.

In any case, it seems to be over for now. I don't like how the school handled it but I can't know if it was a misdirected teacher handling it poorly or if the teacher was following bad school policy. In either case, I'd certainly keep my ears up in this school and try to have my daughter placed next year with the best teacher in that grade.
Good luck.

Yes I think this teacher has punish this child wrongly.she should have found out why this child is takeing things,maybe other kids are takeing from her,or she feels that she is being mistreated in some kind of way.maybe it's a behavior problem that she can't control.before a child is punish harshly teacher's and parents need to find out why this child is doing what they are doing.if the child just want to have her way and destroy things or take things that don't belong to her it is not the school fault and this child should be displine by her parents.this might be a child that just want to have her way because her parents let her do what ever she wants to do.if so the parents is not helping their daughter and things are going to get worse for the family.
When I first started reading this I laugh,and it seem cute that this child was doing this,but as I read more I saw that over a period of time with this behavior from this child can get anoying.because if my child made a project and the teacher put it on the hall display I would not want some other child to eat or mess up my childs work on the school hall board. I don't mean to sound ruff and I love kids and will take up for them if they mean right.(remeber morals,values and respect for others).

HI, I the feelings..(my son is going thr the same situation) I just sending E-Mail with all doctors recommendation on what to do and kept requesting the f.b.a. program (FUNCTIONAL BEHAVIOR ASSESSMENT) meet again with the principal and provide her his any doctors evaluation that you may have on your daughter. DO NOT ACCEPT, anymore for her teacher to treat her LIKE AN ADULT, kids deserve Respect and support, understanding the situation and Why are they doing something that as per the adult point of view is wrong. GET STRONG! i did and recently last week is when the gave the f.b.a program to my son. he is also 5 yrs with ADHD (no aggressive) when the Sped Repr. observed my son and provided the evaluation report to the principal they got in Shock!! the results were: the teachers are NOT prepare to deal with an ADHD student approaching the situation with a Bad Attitude, the main problems was the peer of his teachers. The school counselor gave them a Notification that if my the end of the school year which is in 2-1/2 my son behavior does not improve my son's Neurologist was taking legal action.

Get Strong.. your daughter DESERVE RESPECT!! (go sweet but strong) making all your points clear....also with no offense.. make sure that there is not family issues or any kind of problems that may are affecting your daughter behavior or actions.

is good that you are here!, this is a great website and good/educated people will give you good advices!!

MrsFica, you might want to have your daughter removed from the class, she probably already has feelings of not feeling wanted in the class. The teacher has had her in time-out so much that I am sure the other kids have noticed and said stuff to her. She might feel uncomfortable and unwanted in there. Kids are smart they have good intuition.
My son is 5 yr old, and he will tell me mom, so and so peed during nap time. I will look at my son and say remember he just turned 4 and he had an accident you do not make fun of him. My kid will say alright and continue talking about his day. Maybe your daughter might need counseling, is she going through some family issues?
Also remember, we as mothers are very protective of our kids so when out kids say that something is wrong or someone is teasing them we react by trying to say what are they doing to YOU or who is teasing YOU. So try looking at the problem or issue from the teachers point of view. we as parents tend to take what are kids and just believe what they say when sometimes we need to stop and look at things from another point of view.

I would like to strongly suggest that any parent with a child that has special needs repost their concerns in Learning and Attention Difficulties. community.greatschools.net/groups/11554 There are many people in this group who can help you navigate the school system to get what your child needs.

Also Education Laws and Regs has a wealth of information on how to get what you need from the school district. community.greatschools.net/groups/77570

In Education Laws and Regs is how to get the district to evaluate (not screen) your child. community.greatschools.net/advice/213/How-to-request-the-district-to-evaluate--not-screen--your-child----

Any request you make for services or accommodations that the district says no to ask for Prior Written Notice (PWN). It is a powerful tool. community.greatschools.net/groups/77570/discussion/351660

thks..God bless you... I am going thought rough times with my boys at school.. the 5 years of is a boy. I have a folder of at least 100 E-Mails and phone calls messages left to the principal. thousands of records of organization requesting help, I read hundred of articles, print them. posted in my computer room . Inform my self as much as I can to give my boys the best..contacted the region, once again sent an E-mail on April 14 due that on April 7 I met with my son teacher and with the principal in which she assure me that he was going to be evaluated to receive the behavior plan, I signed the document. Still nothing.. It is very frustrating!!!today I told my son teacher that it is not fear what she is doing to him.. she is driving him and me crazy..yesterday he told me that the teacher made him change his card (behavior/performance) to red since he did not take a book to read..Friday she gave me the book he took and told me not to take any book...."SO" also she gave me his crayons..last week she gave him a bad face because he did not have his crayon when she had giving it to me!!...it is Crazy.. In my older son situation he came home crying..he has 7 yrs-with Auditory Dysfunction/Dyslexia and ADD. the teacher gave him the spelling test on Thurs with his class (38)kids he got a C - since they have to give him the same test 1-1 he got an F (Dyslexia-he already forgot the spelling words) what the teacher did is she con vined the two grade and gave him a D..He knows I do not accept grades lower that B (is the way I have to push him but I know how hard he is trying so it OK) but I do not tell him it is OK..I asked the teacher.. re-taking the test is not to improve his grade?? then how come you con vined and gave him a D..for that them let him with the C..with a very sad and crying face he goes.. mommy I am trying my best!! You know as a mom it hard to see your kids suffering and struggling with situation likes this, in top of that deal with their classmates jokes and rejection!!But once again.. I won't give up!!!

Since we are alerted when people respond to different issues, concerns or comments on this site, I got this email tonight and I am shocked. I am a sub-teacher in a suburban district, studying now to receive my Master's in Secondary Edu. (7-12) and when I read that there are 38 kids in one classroom, and that a teacher is actually MEAN enough to give a child 5 sad faces....what in the world is going on? Can you as an adult imagine being in a cubicle/small offce with 38 people? Can you imagine recieving 5 negitive comments in the course of one day, when you are tyring your best? So imagine how that baby must feel....

What school is this? It's time for you to name names!

Parent, I know you said you and your husband have made massive attempts to rectify this, but your next move needs to be to the board of education for that district. I am guessing that it is too late into the school year to change her class, but there has got to be another way. You have to remember, her record is forming now, and what is being put in there will follow her for a long time....

I know first hand how teachers talk about these kids (and the parents) behind the parents backs in the teachers lounge, even after conferences...and there are so many teachers that are grandfathered into the districts, that they are tired, looking forward to retirement and could care less what really happens with these kids. Sad but true.

I'm praying for you....

Remove her from that school ASAP. Your child will be damaged if she stays in that environment where she is made to feel like a murderer for stealing a marsh mellow. The principal is weak.

OF course we can not generalised, but the majority of kindergarten teachers are not well prepare to deal with kids with ANy kind of behavior or L/D conditions.. they want perfect-Robot kids..I am trully very dissappointed. I am seeking professional and friends advices on how to deal with my son situation. it is not easy since some people just criticited me and blame us as a parent for my kids behavior since he is the 3rd..this are people that has only 1 kid and millions of people around to help with thier education. As my personnal choice I choose to stay home and raise my kids , no money will pay me the satisfaction of being involved in every single activities of my kids and thier education. My boy (5years) with ADHD - unable to be contol by his teachers is a purple belt in karate, since he was two yrs. he loves science/investigating how thing works, spent hours if you let him watching Discovery Channel (how it;'s made- and the Historic Channel) he won't accept a no or a fast answer, he needs a full explanation of his questions..It is normal for a 5 years old having such interest in this areas????

hi, as per the school principal and the sped teacher my son does not qualify for an IEP or any behavior plan. I have being requesting help since the first week of school when they started to give me complain.. My responded was: HOW COME HE DOES NOT QUALIFY FOR A BEHAVIOR PLAN IF DAILY HE IS PLACE IN TIME-OUT OR SENT TO THE PRINCIPAL OFFICE!. I have knock at everyone door to see who can help me. His classroom has 38 kids and as per the teachers he is the only child with ADHD, that decide not to follow the instructions. As per the teachers he fall sleep, they can't wake him up/...how can a 5 years old decided to do whatever!! as a teacher you need to find the way to make that child interest in learning. I contacted CARD, to see if they can help me.. they tried, but once again the principal did not follow their instructions, because she can not agree that her teachers can not deal with my son. Since the situation has escalate my son is only 5 yrs. I sent an E-Mail to the School Region. Still I have not receive a response from his school.. more than 50 phone calls and messages my husband had make without a call back. they keep blaming the situation the "budge cut" My Little one since he was 1 year is saying that he wants to be a mechanical engineer to build Rocket-ships and Al lien airplanes, when he was two his neurologist told me that he was an INDIGO CHILD, now since the school doest not believe in those terms he classify as a kid with ADHD. Multiple doctors notes has being giving to his teachers since his Neo/Phys considered that the teachers are the problem. they got offended when the doctor sent them the recommendation letter. As you can notice I am a very concern and picky mom, I take my kids education very seriously and I have very high expectation for them.. Like I told the Principal my point is not just to complain.. My goal is to resolve the situation for my son best interest since he is starting to reject school saying that no matter what he does the teacher will get mad at him. Just for today he got 5 bad faces on his behavior daily chart that I requested to be done..You have to see his face (sad and confused) mommy Am sorry , Are you mad, Are you Happy mommy? I am trying my best mommy! he brakes my heart, you could see that he does not mean bad not sitting still in classroom or doing his kindergarten activities,, he says there are boring even tho he does not know how to read or write. I believe that the situation is going on around the country, due to the teachers motivation and education do the public school budget. But I WILL CONTINUE THE FIGHT.. MY KIDS DESERVE A GOOD EDUCATION!! ( I have 3 kids- and one of them has L/D (ADP/dyslexia/hearing loss)..My fight will continue!!!for them EVERYTHING!:)

Discipline and Consequences for children who have an IEP or 504 plan can be written into the plan.

Here are some groups that may be of interest to anyone who has a child with special needs.

Learning and Attention Difficulties
community.greatschools.net/groups/11554

Education Laws Regs, Violations Help & Info
community.greatschools.net/groups/77570

idel, Does your child have an IEP or 504 plan? If he does consequences for negative behavior can be written into his IEP or 504 plan.

To answer your question I think the teachers consequences were to severe even if your child did not have ADHD. I feel that taking the book away for the rest of the day would have been appropriate for a 5yr. old. Of course their was no reason for time out because his behavior was not aggressive or dangerous. Also IMO for young children consequences should remain with in the day. Every day should be a fresh start.

thks alot for your support.. That's exactly my complains and concern with my son.. He is only 5 years old and trully do not think that his teachers are doing to correct thing putting him in time out.. His time-out is..35 mnts. per class.. meaning if he missbehave in two classes he is in time out for more than 1 hour each day..The school doest not contact me to let me know what is the problems.. because once again believe that their is not problems it is just them that do not know how to deal with a kid with ADHD..let tell you his last time out..maybe you could tell me if they did the right thing or not *(i think they apprach the situation incorrectly)..last week was book fair at school.. he was happy because he was going to the book fair with $5.00. he selected a cars book with stickers, at the moment of paying I did't know that they were charging taxes so he need it $.37 for taxes, ok they make a big deal that he could buy the book.. luckly that I was working at the library. was able to giving the extra cents..back to his classroom - time for lunch 10 am. he took the book to the cafeteria - the teacher told him that he was not allow to- leave the book in your desk..he pretended to putted in his desk..he hide in his uniform. the teacher saw him.. took the book away for the entire week and place him to eat his lunch at the cafeteria stage floor!! As a mom I do not accept that.. why can the teacher understand the emotion of him going and bying a book- why can she explain to him why he is not allow to take the book to the cafeteria.. instead - tell the kids that after lunch they would have the opportunity to see and share thier book with thier classmate.. but do not take the book away and them put the kid in time out.. they do not know how to use thier chycologic with kids,...this days teachers are to prepare enought to deal with kids with behavior or learning problems.. they just want perfect robot kids...!!

Vacekd1001,
Thanks so much for the link to that article. I have to say that I agree with what he said, although like you I believe time-outs should be used occasionally for short periods of time and never alone. Children learn by example. They need to be taught the appropriate way to act, and things need to be explained to them.

I do agree that there is always an underlying reason for bad behavior. Just talking to a child works wonders.

I found a good article on time out. Although i am not against time out if used appropriately. In my opinion time out should be used for aggressive and dangerous behaviors only. Also time out should never be in a totally secluded area. Time outs need to be short no longer than one minute for every year the child is old.

Although this article is against the use of time out. I feel this article explains what can happen if time out is used to frequently or for to long of a time period.

www.naturalchild.com/guest/peter_haiman.html

where is the school that you are have trouble with the time out? i am have the same trouble with the school my son go to he is 6 and the take him away form the class and out of the other classes too time out are long time too i told them they will not put my son in time out no longer then his age and they don't want to listen to us we go back and forth with the school. my son is a different kid now seance he been in this school and i don't like it. so we are moving and he will go to a norther school

I totally understand where you are coming from, and I agree with you that the timeout thing was way over done....so heres what I would do (and by the way, my son is 5 and in K also...): The pop-up visits to the school is a must...don't stay long, maybe 30 mins.; while you are there, don't participate, observe. You are looking to see your daughter's responses to the teacher, they are not going to change just because you are there, but the non-verbal inter-action between the two of them will tell you alot....this seems to be really bothering you and I am sorry for making light of it in the previous post...but for parents I would just say remember, teachers don't know our kids the same way we do and they have this 'professional' way of dealing with them (at least some teachers do) that is sort of like a one-size fits all approch, but everything is not learned or can be applied from some manual...I really hope this does not escalate for you and your family; but look at the bright side, SCHOOL IS ALMOST OVER!!!!...lol...

I understand what you are getting at mommyanddaddy. But I am not one of those parents who thinks my child is EVER a perfect princess. LOL In fact there are times I could swear they sent me home with the wrong baby- But there are some things about this that I take serious issue to.
1. She has had no serious issues in the past. The punishment didn't fit the crime.
2. If the problem was so bad that she was not able to participate in the classroom activities, why was I not contacted. I would have dropped what I was doing and gone straight to school to deal with the problem.
3. The fact that the teacher could not recall the events of the prior day. I don't accept that from my six year old, certainly not from an adult.
4. Even after being spoken to the by the principal it seemed as if the teacher was trying to "get" the last word.

That being said, we did and will continue to deal with bad behavior. I will be helping out in the classroom every week. If the teacher feels overwelmed by the number of students (25) the school should consider hiring parapro's or TA's. BTW- The kinder classes here are full day (8:30-3:30) Mon-Thurs. So I can see how the teacher may need a hand. But she also as, as Memaw stated, chose this career path, in so doing she agreed to teach my child. Not isolate her from the learning activities in her classroom.
Whew!
Zion, we are in Michigan.
Seremen, she is (of course) a very bright, little girl, who can be a bit sassy-like her DAD. LOL

I would like to ask by chance would your daughter be
attending Homewood Illinois school?

I think that discipline in kindergarten has become a huge problem. Kids that age should never be put in time out for that length of time. Teachers these days don't seem to have the patience or compassion for the job. Personally, I would not want to be responsible for 17 - 25 five and six year olds, but this is the career path they chose.

I would definitely speak with the teacher again and if this continues, maybe set up a meeting with the teacher and principal together. Whatever you do, stay involved. I wonder how many kids that age do not go home and tell their parents what's going on at school. You are lucky that your daughter does.

And I don't believe that you think your daughter is the perfect little princess at school. You seem to agree that there is a problem with her behavior, and also a problem with the discipline used.

I would speak with the teacher again. I think 3 hours time out is too much. This behavior is somehow noticeable among this age group.

What your daughter needs is why that behavior is unacceptable and certain different level of discussion and age appropriate illustrations not unnecessary punishment/isolation.

Do you think of finding out more information on your child's warfare in the school. Is something else going on, you do not know and the teacher refuses to tell you. Is your child very independent, bright, and assertive. How is your daughter over all health. I am giving the teacher the benefit of doubt, but she needs to be extensively examined.

Best wishes!

Please know that I am trying to be humorus in this serious matter, but here is what I am getting from your post. Your daughter, the little Princess that she is to you and your husband, IS NOT THE SAME KID ONCE SHE GETS TO SCHOOL! Parents want the teachers to display 'classroom control' but if your kid is disruptive, (yes your kid) or not cooperating with the task of the class, what other options do you suggest to a teacher who has to not only keep your kid under control, but also the other 17-25 kids in the class?
A 3 hour time-out, not cool....but maybe giving your daughter something else to do would help.

I would want my child in a different classroom. Or I would want to make unannounced visits to the classroom.